When Death Still Stings

As Christians, we have the incredible joy to speak of death with hope.  And while it hurts, we have a peace, too.
I am young, and blessed.  Just about all the experiences with death I can remember have been related to believers, and believers who have been sick for such time that we rejoiced to see their pain ended and their joy and love complete as they are with God.

But what do you do when someone dies who wasn't a Christian?
I'm working day camps with the park district this summer, and this morning at work I was greeted with the terrible news that our camp director died last night.
He wasn't even twenty-three yet.  He was talking about getting married and having kids with the girl he's dated for the past three years, had graduated, and wanted to teach special-needs kids.  Of course, I could be mistaken--after all, who am I to judge another's heart?--but I don't think he knew Christ.
I feel so frustrated when life takes an illogical, ugly turn, clearly revealing the effects of sin's destruction once again; when it just doesn't make sense.

All this hasn't sunk in yet...it's not real.  I ended up leaving work early because of the holiday (too few kids with parents off work), but tomorrow will be here soon, and somehow we'll have to tell the kids without traumatizing them.  I suspect it will be a rough week, and feel more real starting tomorrow morning.

What do you even say, when a non-Christian dies?
How do you comfort someone who was close to them; show compassion without lying?
How do you react when the enemy wins a small victory? Though we know the battle's final outcome, don't the small losses still matter greatly if each life is precious and each human being made in the image of God?

I hate living in a marred, twisted, contaminated world.
What do we do when death wins a victory, and we still feel its sting?